Push Through!
So you remember when you first learned how to ride a bike,
I do because it was last weekend… Yeah, no joke!
Don’t make fun, I’ll tell you how it happened:
When I was a little girl I was being taught how to ride a bike, by my –
lets just say “evil ex-step father”. It was a rather traumatizing
experience that taught me severe lack of trust in another human being
and major fear. He was a scary person, and mentally abusive – at least
in my opinion. That day, I decided, err REFUSED to try to ride a bike
again. Ever, again. I came up with a really clever defense mechanism:
A fashionista neverrrrrr rides a bike. Oh how passé!! I’m not a sporty
girl any way!
Now, as an adult I realize that this taught me to be afraid of pushing
through.
Pushing through when things get tough, and giving into my defense
mechanism again of creating a stubborn excuse as to why I did not want
to be “seen” doing such an un cool thing.
So fast forward to this summer, my boyfriend wanted to go bike riding.
He knew I “didn’t know how to ride a bike.” But he thought by this I
meant – “am a little rusty”, but could for sure ride a bike because
after all – who over the age of 12 can’t? Um, yeah – I couldn’t.
We rented bikes last weekend, I was so excited because I knew I was
finally ready to push through.
I completely trusted my (amazing) boyfriend and I let him guide me.
This is a hard fete for me since I am a super control freak. Probably
because for most of my life I felt like I had no control what so ever.
I would fight to have control, and I even tried to control my own
disappointment by shutting down shop before I get disappointed. Major
road block. This keeps me playing small and I am so over that.
He was super supportive and super calm. He knew I could do it, and I
knew I could do it. And, I DID – and I have the bruises to prove it!
(I still need to practice to get a whole city block though!!!)
The bruises I got from the pedals hitting my calves are all over the
back of my legs, but I’m wearing them with pride because I know I
pushed through it. I pushed through the sweat, the fear, the unbalanced
feeling and self talked my way in to finding my balance. I over came
my fear of someone watching me and judging me struggling to ride a
bike, and I pushed through it.
This applies in life as in business. Push through it. With my first
company RockHardAtelier.com there were some places I did not yet push
through. In past relationships and other opportunities I did not push
through. I was
protecting myself from the hurt of disappointment. Disappointment by
someone else, and disappointment by myself.
The big things in life come from pushing through this boundary of pain
and fear. As my spiritual guru Gabrielle Bernstein said in this week’s
lesson – “You have to stick around for the miracle”.
I did just that.
Pushing through this, and believing I could actually control a bicycle,
instead of fighting against it was a big deal for me. I feel like a
huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders, spiritually, physically
and mentally. I now have the deep confidence to push through, and
really take some bigger risks. Life is an adventure after all right,
and damn those Olympic mountain bike riders really kick some A$$.
Something to aspire to!
So, now what do you need to push through today?
Hope that inspires you!
Xoxo
Emily